15 January 2007

Against all odds

Estimated population of Ile de France stands at approximately 11 million inhabitants: we can safely assume 10% of those males belong to the gay league: 550,000 men.

For the purposes of this exercise, we are only concerned with those who want to have sex with me, so let us round that figure off to a neat 500,000 distributed across one of the world’s most extensive gay scenes.

Since one frequents bars and clubs only, let us multiply that figure by 52 (according to this year’s recently updated map of gay venues) going on to again multiply by 52, given that an excessively handsome gay gentleman with a healthy sex drive, committed to being single and bringing pleasure to others, will have at least one sexual exchange a week.

Finally, let us multiply by the number of nights each year one is on the prowl for casual sex… 365.

493,480,000,000 to 1! Those are the odds, gentle reader… and here are the facts:

  • My only two night stand (Z) occurred in November 2006
  • My best one night stand from 2006 occurred in June 2006- on 25th if you must know- without exchange of calling cards; although our paths accidentally crossed once, no further correspondence whatsoever

What are the chances of those two men, never introduced, picking each another up in a gay venue that one has never frequented… and then deciding to spend a night dancing in the same club where I will be?

Yet on Friday, shortly after I embarked on my tirade against religion in all its forms, that is exactly what happened...

It is a sign!

If there is a god, then it is beyond dispute: she is an evil twisted drag queen, with a fag danglign from her mouth as she cackles into her martini, and she worships everything that I do...

...just like you!

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